My view from Uncle Fester

Above: With Tory cuts a real fear Dyfed Powys' number 1 copper looks forward to his first day as its armed response unit

Dear Lovechickens

Is it me but has there been a Stalinesque state secret in this once great land of ours. Yes we are used to the cult of personality that lasted for 50 plus years in the urals in that SHANE is now everywhere! I appreciate that in 30 years time Arabs will be pulling down the giant statue to the great man erected by the Pick and Shovel in Ammanford and hitting him with their flip flops but has there been a nuclear leak in this country of Chernobyl proportions to produce a back line which most american football defensive lines would be proud.

It is clear that these men are nearly as big as Geoff Wheel which in itself is slightly concerning!! Now I appreciate that George "You wouldn't like me when I'm angry" North is the Dr Bruce Banner of Llangefni thanks to a gamma ray experiment gone wrong in the only place of employment up there namely the Sidoli Ice Cream factory however Alex Cuthbert is bigger and also transforms into a giant green-skinned hulk whenever his pulse rate gets too high and somebody in the crowd offers him a cucumber sandwich - without crusts of course.

I for one believe that we need to return to the halycon days of Welsh threequarter wing play - no not Davies, Rees, Williams and Evans but quality players like Arthur "What a handy Cross Kick" Emyr, Alan " What the fuck are you doing with your hands, well actually what the fuck are you doing full stop" Edmunds and who can forget Roy "Steam Train" Mathias - look him up one cap v France in 1970 but runs a shit hot pub in St. Helens, Lancs. Sorry for the Rant - C3PO's Bald Mate - aka Fester, aka Gregster...... ps. I'm with you as I also feel the Greasers will beat the limeys and we may balls it against polite skirt wearers!