Now the Rooster is very much like the Dark Overlord of the West, Fergatron when it comes to bringing Girlfriends and wives along during Wales/England days. Personally anybody who does should be fingered to death but not by normal size fingers, not even fat stubby fingers like Roberts’ or Taz’ but by the Hindu God Ganesh who is actually half elephant. Yes, so there is the warning: don’t bring Girlfriends to the pub to watch Wales/England.
However skimpily clad young femmes are allowed and so are mistresses...................
Left: Ganesh and he means it!
LC news
Scotland was one of the best weekends that has ever been and I will be able to give a full account once someone tells me what actually happened. One shining light was the time when Ferg, Dev and Snakey were in a club and over saunters The Morgatron, everything seemed fine, we even managed a wee dance and then realised that Morgs only had one shoe. He was then as much use as tits on a fish for the whole tour until he had 36 pro-plus tablets and then lost everybody.
London Welsh has the biggest willy this world has ever witnessed (Ski is THE biggest cock that the world has ever witnessed but that’s by the by) but Ferg has come to the conclusion that there is no joy in his pulling, his technique while pretty flawless lacks the flair and can only be described as ‘workmanlike’ by his peers.
Jamie Roberts the Love Chicken who looks most like an Arab got married. One of the only Lovechickens who is actually nice to people, we wish him well and remind him that his life is now over, she should be changing about now………..I will get the full round up from the 10ft turk copper very soon
The Lovechickens are off to Paris this weekend. Chief Wigham and Mitch ‘the Tige’ Mitchell will be taking the Fishguard Lovechickens to the land of romance and surrendering. For Floppsy Thomas and Gar San Francisco, this is a journey into the unknown, the last time these two went abroad was to Lemington Spa in 2003.
Upcoming events
Wales/England
I want a bumper gang of miscreants up for the Wales/England match. Friday will again be a day of the gathering where we pretend that we aren’t going to drink much, drink too much and have a really tired shit Saturday until we are twatted about 9 o clock.
The Fergatron will be playing rugby for his workplace against the House of Commons. Don’t mock, many people would pay a lot of money to be allowed to step on MP’s heads. Whilst he probably wont win Man of the Match he will undoubtedly receive most handsome player and wittiest man on the pitch.
Early news is that Veteran Lovechicken ‘Belly’ will be coming up from the land of the lilies where he will spend all day bickering with Clysts followed by an hour missing home, followed by an hour dancing like a gay.
If he is not dead, Nunny is also up for a sesh.
It’s a cap – nuff said!?!
Oh yeah Vegetarian Neil will not be there, he is saving orphan dolphins and then off for some valuable R and R in Angola – health check anybody? Actually thinking about it – I honestly think he has just come back from Thailand which means the reason he has been so quiet is because he and his new wife Rochelle-Derek wu hin are settling down in Cardiff.
Regards you Bummers
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